When we cannot control what is in us – our feelings, emotions; then we seek to control out there.
In relationships, when we struggle to manage our own emotions—whether it’s feelings of frustration, insecurity, or betrayal—we often attempt to control the external environment, including our partners. But the truth is, relationships cannot be controlled. What we can control, however, is how we perceive and respond to the dynamics of our relationships.
It’s often said that love conquers all, but maintaining a healthy relationship requires a constant shift in perspective. We are wired to make quick judgments, especially when we feel hurt or treated unfairly. This can lead to a cycle of criticism and blame, where the desire to be right or to have control over the situation takes over.
Have you ever paused to ask yourself:
- “Why do I need to be right?”
- “What do I truly gain by being right?”
- “Will being right matter in the long run—weeks, months, or even years from now?”
This urge to control or be right is natural, but it’s important to recognize that letting go of this need doesn’t make you any less of a person. In fact, it can strengthen your relationship in meaningful ways. Here’s how:
- Increased Self-Awareness: By choosing your battles wisely and focusing on inner peace, you nurture your mental health and emotional intelligence. You become more aware of when it’s about control rather than genuine concern.
- Empowerment Through Emotional Control: Letting go of the need to be right allows you to regain control over your thoughts and feelings, helping you create a healthier mindset about your relationship.
- Mutual Respect: As you grow in self-respect, your partner may also develop a deeper respect for you, fostering mutual understanding and harmony.
If you find yourself constantly trying to be right or control your partner, take a moment to reflect on what’s driving this need. Dig deep, or seek professional help and you might uncover the key to a more fulfilling and peaceful relationship.